I admit. I’m reading them, I like them, and I’ve translated a few things into real life. This by no means I’ve gone all “red room of pain” but there was a hilariously epic fail trying to be sexy with an ice cube and a few flirty emails. The books are a nice escape when I’m looking to zone out for a few minutes from time to time and I’m enjoying getting an extra little kick of sass and confidence. Are you reading? Loving or not so much?
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Gorgeous night watching the Cards/Cubs with AB. The kiss cam came on an inning ago and I’ve never seen someone so excited… He popped his collar, put his arm around me and was ready to go. It was silly, romantic, and just what I needed to realize we’re back.
AB and I had a very difficult few days last week.
We fought like hell to pull through it and have come out the other side.
This won’t be the last time that our relationship is challenged but, for me, it is the last time that I am going to allow outside influence to create insecurity in me.
During the course of talking about everything and working to push through it AB said something to me that cut to the very core of me and it in turn revealed something about the condition of my heart. ”My feelings for you are unwavering. I haven’t simply chosen to be with you, I am choosing to be with you. It is a continuous act that I hope manifests itself in my actions.” Immediately I began to cry and realized that I expected him to walk away. I fully expected him to no longer chose me when things got harder than I’d pictured they could be… but he stayed and he fought through it with me. We were never fighting with one another, rather fighting against a lot of shitty things laid in our way that I let affect our relationship.
It’s caused me to do a lot of soul searching and I now know that I need to develop the confidence to know that I am good enough. Good enough to be chosen. Good enough to survive alone. Good enough to accomplish any dream or goal. I’m not totally sure what the journey to fully living that out is going to look like but I see some changes coming on the horizon.
My best friend.
Teen Girls Ask the Important Questions With John Hamm
GROWN MAN QUESTIONS
He also says, “Slow your role” which was a highlight.
I’ve got nothing happy to say right now and this is the first thing that’s made me smile today so I figured I’d just leave it here. My heart is aching today and I am in serious need of my best friend not living a time zone and several states away.
(via mayerthorn)
Barack Obama (via newsweek)
(Source: thedailybeast.com, via newsweek)
I realize I’m being ridiculous but quite frankly I just don’t give a damn.
Lately I’ve been the bigger person is about 90% of my relationships with family, friends, etc… and I’m just over it at the moment. There is this feeling of disconnection and discontent looming over me and I wish I knew how to get rid of it but I tried the one thing that always works tonight (running) and it made things worse. My stress fracture seems to be coming back to haunt me again this training season and I have an appointment for next week to see a new specialist. I plan on taking a hot shower, asking AB to make me a cup of tea, and reading my book until I fall asleep.
Hoping that tomorrow is a better day.
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It’s been an amazing weekend and I can’t think of a better way to top it off than lunch and local beers at Local Harvest. There’s something amazing about realizing you’ve spent 40+ hours with someone and haven’t once wanted to be anywhere else. It’s an easy Sunday kind of love.
Dinner here.
Jazz at the Bistro seeing this.
I don’t think I could be more excited about tonight.
| SGD: | Men should not be in charge of the alarm clock, thank goodness it's appropriate for me to show up to work in yoga pants. This is the second time in two weeks I've been almost late. |
| Ashley: | Oh I know. B likes to lay in bed in the AM too. |
| SGD: | Yesterday we were supposed to go for a run because AB is concerned about me going by myself in the dark. I'll give you one guess what actually happened. |
| SGD: | We did not run. We slept in for 20 minutes. Then we made out. Good for relationship, bad for marathon training. |
| Ashley: | Yes! B lays around forever then he wants to make out, which is nice, but yesterday I informed him that if you want to make out you need to make your move after the FIRST alarm goes off, buddy. |
| SGD: | THANK YOU. YES! That is what the EARLY alarm is for. If you miss your window you may NOT attempt again on the "holy crap get up right this second alarm." |
| Ashley: | EXACTLY. |
| SGD: | Gosh we're smart. We should print pamphlets. |
